Dream lives for ever!

After a stay-up night

Sometime, when I try to write something down, I don't know where to begin. Last night, I waited until 3:30am to go to bed and after 3 hours' short sleep; I get up at 6:00 am as usual.

Last night was supposed to be an normal night which I should watching movies and browsing some pages and go to sleep, just as yesterday and the day before yesterday and so on. But one thing make that night different form others: a phone call. I make a phone call to someone I do not supposed to call for the rest of my life at least not when I still think call him or not as a problem to me. I do not want to call one and let him consider me as the miserable girl dumped by him. (ok, I am thinking too much. That's fine. That's the mistake I always make) But I cross the "not-calling" line draw by myself just because one post on gter, which posted by him 12 days ago saying that what present he should give to the girl he had feelings to. I can not describe clearly that what I feel when I saw this post, but I remember that a moment some pictures just jumped into my mind and moving very fast, pictures contains everything happened between us form the begin to the end. I feel tired of holding such memories all by myself, and tired of holding back what I should say. So I call him anyway. I deleted every thing concerning him one month ago, so I ask another girl for his number.

"Hello," when his voice comes form the other side, I feel that it is the time. I talked and laughed, and spoke everything straight out and I know everything is over. He told me about the girl he had a crush on, and told me that he is hoping that she will call him and so on. Right before that he did not willing to tell me that because he considers that fact he fell for another girl as the ruthlessness reality that would make me unhappy. So just as I afraid of, his sorry for his "dump-me-thing" make me pathetic. Being pathetic and miserable is what I can not bear or take. So I told him not to feel sorry about anything. So he began to tell me about his love story and still with all the uncertain words just like before. Suddenly ,I saw he loves the girl in the way exactly like the way he loved me; I changes much after breaking up with him, but he stays the same. Luckily that I finally, make he laugh and talk even more than when we together in the last call I made. I find I can understand him since he is so easy to understand.

All the uneasiness, resentness along with the sadness are gone with the call. I do not know the definition of the fully recovery but I do know is that :when I put the memory behind my back, I know the best one is always the next one. Just like a girl said: In the supermarket, on your way to the cash register, you will pick up many goods and put them back. I encounter wrong person and put them back.

Life will go on.

posted by Sherry @ 11:27 PM